Chronicles of Ian Karlo: the graveyard shift

Is nighttime, is it? or is it morning already? I don’t know I keep losing track of time and everything else that makes sense. I was dreaming about? Eh? Don’t remember, but it was a good one for sure. I wonder if I can go back to sleep and continue with my dream. What was that? I open one eye and it is dark for sure in our bedroom, only the track light shinning dimly silhouettes on the wall.  I close my eyes again in search for that wonderful dream I don’t remember. What is that noise? Could it be? I open my eyes, raised my head and I look at a bassinet next to my bed. In it sleeps my son, only that he is not asleep, but fidgeting again. Could he be hungry again? I thought. When was the last time he ate? it seemed like seconds ago. What’s going on? Silence reigns again and I immediately fall asleep. Then a distinctive cry breaks the silence, rising slowly louder and louder. My son has woken up, activating his hunger alarm. I look at my wife, “the kitchen”, provider of my son’s food and she is non-responsive. I nudge her and she opens one eye as if she can just shut it and go back to sleep. The cry grows even louder, getting my wife’s full attention now. She slowly sits up and arranges a barricade of pillows to support her. Already in position, half asleep, I hand her over our son, but when did I pick him up? I can’t tell is a blur to me. One thing for sure, somehow I always know where his head is as if I am only holding my son’s head without a body…weird! The graveyard shift has started, feeding our son and changing diapers. Those are the only tasks to do at a rate of every one and half to two hours time. If we do the math it is roughly, let see…a diaper change times every time he is fed…um…well over a hundred diaper changes already. My job is to handle my boy to “the kitchen”, which is always open, and change his diaper, that’s it. I immediately go to sleep once I do the first part of my duty, only to wake up again to change his diaper. “I just gave him to you” I mumble, it seems like seconds ago. Before she handles the boy back to me there are some preparations in order. I get the “tools” and materials from a nearby table to prepare for the dirty job where things sometimes happen unexpectedly. I am so tired that I might just say to myself “That diaper looks fine, I think I’ll just put him back in his bassinet” and go to sleep. Something always tells me to check his diaper whether is my wife muttering something half asleep or a voice in my head? I don’t know, but I check his diaper and sure enough, it needs to be changed almost all the time. One instance, I didn’t think he needed change and reluctantly checked his diaper…I just wanted to go back to sleep and continue with my wonderful unfinished dreams. This time to my surprise, as soon as I opened his bulging diaper, I found the mother load and my son greeted me with a waterworks display that surely woke me up. He peed on me and on my bed; it was a powerful squirt and also very warm.  “What the heck” I said, looking at the disaster and to my wife. We just laughed at the moment, but my boy wasn’t so keen about why we were laughing and was getting annoyed by it, screaming top of his lungs. Invariably after I change his diaper, I hand the boy over to “the kitchen” for seconds just to hear my son doing his business on the clean and fresh diaper I recently changed. “ I just changed that diaper son, so you just going to have to hold it until the next round”, I declared and nose-dive on my bed, fast asleep to be woken up seconds later to put him back on his bed or ….to give it back to the kitchen? I don’t know I just want to sleep!