Response-ability: cause and reaction

Have you ever had a random thought that later becomes reality? Well, this morning on my way to work I saw many people being pulled over by the state troopers. It was a speed trap, right on rush hour. I was driving at the speed limit and as I passed by several of them I thought about the drivers getting the ticket, thinking something like: “What a way to start the day”. Little I know that thought was going to haunt me later in the day. Driving home from the site I worked, I got into a conversation with my wife regarding her pregnancy and the doctor’s visit.  Out of my peripheral vision I saw a blur of what appeared to be a patrol car and before I could react, I was being pulled over by the state trooper.  Déjà vu you say?

I got a ticket for speeding and also a ticket for having illegal window tints. The latter took me by surprise because I have this truck for 10 years and never once I was told the window tints were illegal.  He was cocky and claimed vehemently to know the law. I could have complained but I knew it was not going to be of any use. He was not going to budge and I knew that when he came out of his car with the clipboard. He gave me a “lesser” fine out of his kindness and was expecting for me to thank him. I was fuming! The little devil popped on my shoulder and was fueling my anger. I cursed him left and right …under my breath of course. I thought it was unfair, uncalled for. Who does he think he is? To me he was just making his “quota” of tickets for a bonus or else bragging rights. I was angry at him and felt my aura shifting. He ruined my day, this (insert expletive here) guy, should be minding his business somewhere else. What if I was over for 7-10 miles , so what? There are others out there speeding, driving carelessly, distracted and you pulled ME over and give me a ticket? Let’s not even go about the window tint. I have this car for 10 years and nobody said flip about it and now you say something because you know the law and know how to do your job? Yes, I was outraged!

I took several deep breaths and then the Angel popped on my other shoulder to say his two cents worth. I didn’t want to hear it, I wanted to fret about my situation wanted to yell “why, why me” and at this time in my life, expecting a baby, bills to pay etc… then I became still, thinking and started to ponder things out while unconsciously nodding slightly. I knew it; didn’t want to accept it, not even considered, but it was so. Somehow and perhaps without consciously knowing, not wanting to, I caused all this turmoil. Somehow I attracted this situation. It may not be my fault entirely, but I have to admit that I am totally responsible for it.  If I hadn’t be speeding because I was on the phone semi-distracted, I would have seen the patrol car on the side of the shoulder or better yet I could have maintain the speed limit and none of this would have happened.  I can’t say much about the window tints though. Despite of been so long ago to be grandfathered in, it was probably a matter of time until I was caught. Unfair, yes, back luck? Indeed! Was this event going to ruin the rest of my day? It almost did, I confess and I am glad I thought it over and took it in.

The trooper was just doing his job, although I wish he didn’t but it could have been much worse of course. God knows what would have happened if I had lost my temper which I got close, very close. I admit it, I fell off the wagon in a matter of minutes, my blood was boiling inside as the trooper handed me the tickets. I probably would have been featured in TV’s Most Shocking Moments, “Out of Control Drivers VI” or worse could have gotten tasered and arrested.  I was still mad once he left and vented furiously to my wife over the phone, but after much huffin’ and puffing, I settled down, looked in the rear view mirror, adjusted my halo, with great effort said to myself “Sorry this happened to me mate, please forgive me for not paying attention and to have caused this predicament at this moment, I love you and this will NOT ruin my day. I take responsibility and will move forward”.  I drove off saying “thank you for proceeding like this, now let’s move on with the rest of my day”.